My Ideal Man

(photo credits to PAHULAGWAY)

HE IS GOOD LOOKING, neat and attractive, very smart, a good communicator and a marketing manager of a giant print media establishment in the Philippines. He is a Chinese-Filipino and is every Filipino woman's dream man. He has everything I was looking for in an ideal husband. Everything, indeed, except that he is not a member of the same church I go to.

You see, I am an Iglesia ni Cristo member and it is strictly prohibited for us to marry someone outside the church. 

I used to work as a Business Correspondent in a competing newspaper company in 2007. I was 22 when I met him then. He was a few years older than I. I was deeply attracted to him the first time we met at an event we both attended for a news coverage. Then we met again for another event where we involved in a longer conversation and hence, got to know each other more than "hi" and "hello". I enjoyed his company a lot. Unknowingly, he felt the same and unexpectedly, was attracted to me. 

Give and take a few more weeks, he expressed his feelings for me and I was in seventh heaven. Who would have thought that this almost perfect man (and so I thought) would find a plain-looking and simple young lady like me interesting. 

So, such a dilemma started. Human as we are, we're sometimes swayed by our emotions while our mind tries to battle with our heart. I was in a situation where I was torn between upholding my Christian beliefs or returning my feelings to the man of my dreams, going against the church laws, making agreements to a non-member and thus, giving in to temptations. 

I love my membership in the church because I consider it my holy calling to be a part of the flock. I value dearly the laws that I have to adhere to to keep my membership undaunted and unstained. So as to lessen the guilt I was feeling for developing mutual feelings for this man, I told him about my being an INC member and how the church strictly prohibits us from committing ourselves in a relationship with non-members. I told him he needs to be converted to INC first before I will agree to be in a relationship with him. 

Temptations do not give up easily. The enemy of our faith is also consistent on its goal to covet our faith and lead us astray. And so, he assured me that being together is not a mortal sin and won't affect my membership in the church.   

While I said "no" to him several times, I also prayed  more than once that God will call him in the church as well. But HE never did. I was sad about it, even a little disappointed you may say. But it was then I realized that such a dilemma happened at a perfect moment. You see, he came to my life a month or two before the Holy Supper. Thus, we were preparing ourselves for a very important occasion. 

During the Holy Supper, we will be commemorating Jesus' death on the cross, to remember how He died for the forgiveness of our sins. As INC members, it is imperative to prepare ourselves for such a very important occasion by living a life free from wrong-doings and sins, so we will be worthy to partake our share in the body and blood of Jesus Christ. Hence, it is no coincidence that I happened to meet this so-called man of my dreams in the advent of such a very important occasion. 

I knew then that it was Satan knocking on my door with something alluring to offer me. Temptation was waiting at my door like a lion dressed in a lamb skin, waiting for me to fall prey to its treachery. Weak as I was then, I strengthened my nightly devotional prayer. I knew I could not do it alone. Hence, I seek for God's guidance in making the right decision. I implored to Him to make me stronger against temptations. 

I knew then that I had to be smart enough to battle the enemy. With anxiousness in my heart but firm faith and trust in God, I talked to him about my decision. While it was so hard to deny my feelings for him, I politely said my final "no".  His response surprised me a lot. Because of my firm conviction in holding on to my faith, he respected me all the more. He smiled and told me, "I hope my future daughter will be like that, strong in her beliefs, just like you." 

Such stage in my life ended beautifully as we become very good friends until now. God never abandoned me even a second at that moment and thus, He closed such dilemma with a blessing of friendship. 

And so fast forward to the present, that man whom I thought was my ideal man then, is now happily living with his son in Manila. As for me, I am living the life I've always wanted. Here in my humble little abode in Tokyo, I wake up everyday and open my eyes to a good looking, neat, attractive, smart and musically-talented man. He is Chinese-Filipino and the best part is, an active member of the church, and with that, all the other great qualities follow. We perform our duties in the church together. He, as the District Choir Director and I, as a choir member/organist. Having someone whom I can share my happiness in performing my church duties is my dream man, indeed, my ideal husband. 

I continue to revel in God's great blessings as I pondered on His great love for us. He doesn't only give us what we need, but even what we want provided that we always put Him first above all else and follow His commandments at all times. I never regretted standing my grounds when beset with a certain temptation. God never forgets our sacrifices and hence, I could never ask for more now that I am married to my ideal man.